Rejoice Not

 It was April, 2010 and we were just about to enter the McLeod Center in Cedar Falls for a concert featuring Casting Crowns.  I was escorting the high school students to the correct entrance when my fellow leader Becky said, "Amber has been in a really bad car accident and has been air lifted to Iowa City."

We decided to not mention it to the kids so they could enjoy the concert because they couldn't do anything and we didn't really know anything.

Meanwhile, I was in a bit of shock.  I couldn't focus on the concert.  The only song I remember hearing was "Praise You in This Storm", to which I replied in my head, "Shut up, Casting Crowns! Not now."

My thoughts were partially on Amber.  I thought of her and her family, but then I was comforted knowing that if she died, her eternity was secure.  She knew and loved Jesus, of that I was sure.  My mind went to the urgency of getting the unsaved and unsure kids in the youth group to know and love Him before they were the ones being air lifted.

That night one girl's name came into my mind and I can't tell you exactly why.  I believe God placed her name in my mind and I became burdened to see her proclaim Jesus as Savior and live for Him.  

(Amber did survive through miracle after miracle and now she's a wonderful woman, wife, foster mom, disciple and teacher)

So, I had this student on my mind.  Then, I don't remember how, we got it set up to meet weekly and study the Bible at the local coffee shop.  God had answered one of my prayers.

We met and met and met.  I watched her grow slowly yet surely.  I helped her navigate problems in her life and felt as though I was making the difference God impressed upon my heart to make.

Then one night after midnight I got a call.  This student was hysterical and inebriated.  So, I went to her house to find her and three others there without adult supervision.  Looooooooong story short... I took multiple sets of keys away, I took a knife away, I helped her sober up and stay safe.  It was a youth leader's unheralded late night duty fulfilled.

A few days later I told her we needed to meet to talk about what had transpired.  We did and she could not have cared less.  She refused to recognize her sin, her depraved actions, her dangerous behavior and her problem.  I felt as though I was beating my head against a brick wall.  She just kept saying, "I don't know why you think this is a big deal."  She, looking back, was simply a stubborn kid, but I was hurt because I wanted something more for her than she wanted for herself.

I called my pastor.  We met in his car outside the Spring Waverly Horse Sale.  I wept big, fat tears in his car as I described my godly burden for this student and my inability to help her.  I was frustrated to the max and I couldn't understand how I crumbled over this one soul and he was shepherding so many more.

Pastor Jim took me to a passage that saved my ministry life.

In the book of Luke, Jesus sent out 72 people to minister and they had massive success.  Jesus' response to them upon their return was odd and life saving for me.

"The seventy-two returned with joy and said, 'Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name.'
He replied, 'I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.  I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.  However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in Heaven." Luke 10:17-20

Verse 20 saved my sanity.  I would not be involved in youth ministry still without it.  I would not be a foster parent without it.  I would not be a sane parent without it.  Pastor Jim dropped a gem in my lap that afternoon that has kept me keeping on.

See, our joy must never be rooted in success.  The young girl from this story is a woman of whom I am proud of today.  She didn't stay stubborn through this teenage crisis.  But that's not where I found joy.  I learned that to stay sane in ministry I had to keep my central joy my salvation.  I had to remember the wonderful, unexplainably wonderful, joy that comes from knowing my name is written in the Lamb's Book of Life.

Friends, in ministry and in all of life we will have success and we will have seemingly fruitless labor.  Rejoice not that you win or lose some battles.  Rejoice that your name is written in Heaven.  Jesus knew there would be days when the demons didn't flee.  He knew there would be days when the crowd would turn to Him in the thousands after Peter's first sermon and that Paul would be stoned by the crowd after one of his.  The outcomes of our work aren't where we root our joy.  Our salvation is.

Should we cheer when we get wins?  Absolutely.  Should our joy be anchored to success?  Absolutely not.  

Let your chief joy be your own salvation today.